When I am overwhelmed (and I feel too blessed to even think about complaining), I take it one day at a time.

When I cannot imagine how to finish (or even start) a big project,  I take it one step at a time.

When I am faced with problems that push me to just quit everything, I stop thinking and ask God for help.

I have accepted the fact that as much as I would want to be as positive as possible, there are people or things that will make me (almost) fall apart. And there’s only one thing that will help me go through them and go on with life… FAITH IN GOD.

I thank God because however difficult my day has been, I survive it with my loved ones.

It never fails.

If I have to live the year 2011 all over again, I wouldn’t change a thing.

I have learned so many things and proved once again that I can do more than I can imagine. I am a businesswoman, tutor, driver and a student while being a full time mom and wife. Best thing about all these, Gary and I are ‘growing-up’ with our kids.

God has blessed us tremendously, not just with material things and travel opportunities but more importantly the difficulties and challenges that came our way. For one, having a business does not guarantee a regular income. Clients come and go. If I would think about the future, it would be too scary. But I did not allow those future worries affect my present, on the contrary, it made me more thankful of what I have now and just live each day at a time. It’s not easy but it can be done. Looking back, I haven’t faced yet those things that were causing all my worries and I don’t think I ever will because of God’s perfect timing.

Now 2012 looks even brighter. May the Lord continue to bless, teach and use all of us to fulfill His will.

Let’s do good and live a good life.

Oprah_World tweets “You can have it all. You just can’t have it all at once.”

I agree. I remember Gary telling me in Venice that my dreams have been fulfilled already. Those dreams don’t have to be big dreams, they can be simple and ordinary to some but fulfilling for me. I told him with wide grin that it only means one thing, I have to create another set.

Just recently I was thinking that it would be nice to spend a birthday or holiday in one of Discovery Suites’ big rooms. I did not push the idea. Days after, an agent called me up offering me Discovery Suite membership with numerous perks. I prayed, “Oh God, that was fast!” It was simple yet sweet.

Big or small, I encounter these answered prayers everyday. Of course I won’t see them if I let worries, fear and problems overcome me. I count my blessings. Contrary to what Gary said, I still have a number of dreams waiting to be fulfilled, not to mention those I’ve added on the list. Just a reminder, when an answered prayer comes, it doesn’t usually come in the form you’re expecting. In those times, also pray for wisdom and understanding.

So how do I get what I want, here’s a list.

1. When I ask God, I’m specific.
2. I hold on to my dreams because, unimaginable as it is today, it can really happen in the future. I don’t know how, but God makes it happen.
3. I always remind myself to be generous, kind, considerate, humble and thankful.
4. I pray wherever and whenever I feel the urge… for whatever reason.
5. Despite all the negative things happening around… I keep the faith.

The rest is up to Him. God will either answer it immediately, delay it for the perfect time or give me something better. What more can I ask for?

My son and nephew enjoy our spelling game. They usually spell the words correctly while I correct those they missed. Sometimes my nephew would say, ‘I can’t spell it, it’s a BIG word for me.’ So I’ll just give him another one to spell.

When I started reading the ‘Secrets of the Millionaire Mind’ I realized that I have my own set of big words as well. It’s not about spelling of course (though I’m not really fond of it hehe), but words that seems so hard for me to handle. TRUST for one. It’s the main reason why I want to be in control of things and doesn’t want to entrust my life to anybody 100%. I finished my education, got a job and did good with my profession because I want to have a fall back whatever happens. I don’t think it’s wrong of course, but I realized that I did it for the wrong reason. Fear (of the future) is my strong motivation which should be/have been happiness and fulfillment. Even the time I quit my job, I know the business can sustain us or else I wouldn’t risk it. I can talk endless about my trust issues but I guess I have to deal with it myself.

I just want to share a story from the book I’m reading because it made me smile.

It’s about a man who is walking along a cliff and all of a sudden loses his balance, slips and falls off. Fortunately, he has the presence of mind to grab on to the ledge and he’s hanging there for dear life. He hangs and hangs and finally yells out,”Is there anybody up there who can help me?” There’s no answer. He keeps calling and calling, “Is there anybody up there who can help me?” Finally this big bellowing voice calls back, “This is God. I can help you. Just let go and trust. Next thing you hear: “Is there anybody else up there who can help me?”

Wapak! Hit me big time. With this, I want to remove worry and fear from my vocabulary and replace it with risk, growth and more faith. They’re equally big words but I am willing to learn.

I don’t really do book reviews because I have this fear of giving away the meat of the story thus leaving nothing for the readers to look forward to. ‘The Shack’ though has inspired me so much that I want to share not the story itself but the learning and realizations I had while reading the book. Actually, there’s nothing new about the teachings. It’s just that with our daily struggles in life, we tend to forget how loving our God is and neglect trying to be the same with ourselves and others. It’s not my objective to convince anyone with this blog. I would just like to enumerate the things that struck me while reading the book, so that I have something to go back to when things get a little rough. If I have to influence anyone of anything, it’s to read the book and encounter God in his own time and space.

1. Quoting from the book, ‘I’m (God is) not merely the best version of you that you can think of. I am (God is) far more than that, above and beyond all that you can ask or think.’ So, let us not limit God with what He can do based on our capacity.

2. Don’t define yourself with your pre-conceived limitations but by the intentions God set for you. You are a child of God, nothing less.

3. God is Love. He has opened the doors for us to have a relationship with Him (through Jesus). He is just waiting for us to accept it because Love is not about force.

4. God is a parent. If parents want the best for all their children, even the ones that do bad things, how much more for God. He saved us not for who we are but for who He is and His love for us.

5. Let us not judge too easily, it’s not because a person doesn’t think or act like you means you’re right and he is wrong. Quoting Marilynne Robinson ‘… we are so persuaded of the rightness of our judgement as to invalidate evidence that does not confirm us in it.’ As the book says, ‘Humans have a great capacity for declaring something good or evil, without truly knowing.’

6. It is by our freedom and independence that ‘bad things’ happen. Fortunately, God uses every choice we make for the ultimate good and the most loving outcome. That is why we believe in blessing in disguise. In reality, God makes a blessing out of our mistake.

7. We fill ourselves with so much pain, anger and worries to the point of blinding us and making us fall short of receiving God’s grace.

In summary, God fought the battle for us. Let us experience the joy of surrendering everything to Him. Easier said than done, but at least we can try.

It was a rainy Sunday afternoon. Aboard our SUV, we were heading home from Pangasinan. It was a comfortable and peaceful ride as we hear the strong downpour on the roof while running at around 60-70 kph. Suddenly, a white sports car swiveled uncontrollably at the passenger side of our vehicle. I immediately tapped Gary’s hand to alert him but by then we were already hit by the car. The next thing I knew our SUV tipped and skidded to the right side and as the vehicle turned turtle several times, I embraced Lia very tight as she was sleeping in my arms. All I was thinking at that time was that I hope this is not happening and at the same time thought it could be the end. During the final turn, Lia was suddenly gone. I have no idea how she fell or thrown away because all along I was holding her very tight. When our vehicle finally stopped and I saw Gary moving, I immediately unlocked my seat belt and found my way out of the vehicle to find Lia. Scared and half hopeful that she was still alive, I was shouting “Anak ko!” I went to the other side of the vehicle and looked at my right and all I saw were tall grasses. I looked at my left and there she was lying on the mud crying because of the strong rain pouring on her. Thinking back, ‘Jesus on a manger’ is the best description of how she was safely placed. Knee hurting, I ran to her as fast as I could, embraced her tight, checked her for any wound and thanked God she was alive.

Seconds after, my husband, 2 sons and our yaya came running at our side. My eldest son, Marcus, embraced me tight crying and yelling, “Mama, ayoko na! Ayoko na!” Zach, on the other hand, was also crying maybe from shock because he was sleeping before the incident happened. Gary and I looked at each other without saying a word but thinking the same thing, “we are all safe now.” A van stopped and a woman calling to help us. She allowed the children to go inside her van because it was raining really hard and the kids are cold. Marcus doesn’t want to leave me alone, but I assured him that everything is ok now, that he has to look after his two younger siblings because I’m wounded and that I love him very much. I was left sitting where I found Lia because Gary doesn’t want me to move any further because he saw the deep wound on my knee. While the kids were inside the van and Gary calling for help, I tried to get up and go farther but my right knee is not helping. So I just decided to sit down and wait for the rescue to come. It was the time I got the chance to see everything that’s left of us. Our 4-month old SUV was a total wreck, my phone gone and our other belongings wet and scattered. I can’t help but wonder, “Why did God allowed this to happen?” But it was not anger or hatred that was in my heart at the time, it was gratitude and relief. Looking at the glass half full, I thanked the Lord and praised Him because all that were gone can be replaced.

Looking back, I don’t remember anything that could have stopped us from encountering the incident. One thing’s for sure though, God has prepared everything to ensure that we’ll be safe and taken cared of. It was indeed a miracle. When I saw the pictures of our wrecked vehicle, it made me cry because I cannot possibly think how all of us survived.

I remember the words I said after we prayed the Our Father, Hail Mary, Glory Be and Angel of God while on the road and before the incident… “Lord, please keep us safe.” He did.

We are a living testimony of His Greatness.